What Happens in a Wedding Ceremony? (A Celebrant Explains)
Most of us have been to a wedding or two - but hopefully you have been so swept up in the moment you haven’t been taking notes on the structure!
One of the best things about a civil wedding ceremony (that is, a non-religious ceremony) is that - aside from a small amount of mandatory legal wording - you truly can personalise the ceremony to reflect you.
There’s no single “right” way for it to look or sound. Your ceremony can be relaxed, modern, heartfelt, light-hearted, or a mix of all of the above. You can include meaningful moments, skip anything that doesn’t resonate, and shape the experience so it feels authentic rather than scripted. You can start with a speech from a friend or a reading, or jump straight into the legal aspects and get them out of the way! It can be just you two and your witnesses (and me!) or all of your nearest and dearest.
That said, most ceremonies do follow a natural flow, and having a structure in mind can make planning feel far less overwhelming. Below, I’ll walk you through what typically happens in a wedding ceremony, and where you have the freedom to make it your own.
Arrival & Welcome
Your ceremony usually begins with your celebrant welcoming your guests and setting the tone for what’s to come.
This opening might include:
A warm welcome to everyone present
A brief acknowledgment of the location and the significance of the day … and how awesome you are
An Acknowledgement of Country
A gentle invitation for guests to be present and connected (a reminder to put phones on silent)
This helps everyone settle in and signals that something meaningful is about to happen.
Ta-Da! The Entrance
The walk down the aisle is one of the most anticipated moments of the ceremony - cue your special song - but it’s also one of the most flexible.
Traditionally, this might look like one partner walking down the aisle to music, often accompanied by a parent or loved one. But there are so many ways to approach this, and there’s no requirement to do it any one way.
Some couples choose to:
Walk down the aisle together
Have both partners enter separately
Be accompanied by a parent, grandparent, sibling, or friend
Skip a formal aisle altogether and simply gather with guests
If the idea of all eyes on you feels overwhelming, you’re not alone - and it doesn’t have to feel like a performance. This moment can be kept short, gentle, and grounded, with music, movement, or shared arrival helping to take the focus off you and bring you into the moment.
What matters most is that it feels comfortable and true to you.
Once everyone is in place, your celebrant will begin the ceremony.
Your Story (we love this part!)
This is where your ceremony truly becomes yours. I have a handy, quick little couple’s questionnaire I can give you once you book in with me, that helps to get all the beautiful details into your ceremony.
We might share:
How you met
What you love and admire about each other
What marriage means to you
What has brought you to this moment
A personalised wedding ceremony isn’t about oversharing or performing, it’s about telling your story in a way that feels genuine, relaxed, and recognisable to the people who know you best.
Readings, Rituals & Special Moments
This is the most flexible part of the ceremony, and where many couples choose to add something meaningful. And some don’t want any of them at all! You can include as much or as little as you like. There are no rules here.
You might include:
A poem or reading (friends and family love being involved in this way. It’s often a nice way to include someone who isn’t chosen as a witness or with some other role in your wedding)
A ritual such as a ring warming, candle ceremony, or a box/jar of well wishes from guests
Involvement from family or friends - have musical friends? A poet in the crowd?
The Asking
Often confused as a legal requirement, the asking is the part where the celebrant will say, “Do you [insert your name here] take [your partner’s name] to be your lawfully wedded…”
This is a nice way to lead into the vows and legal section!
The Legal Wording (the must-do part)
In Australia, there are a few legal elements that must be included for your marriage to be official.
Your celebrant will guide you through this, but it includes:
Specific legal statements, including the Monitum (where I state who I am, that I’m legally authorised to marry you and the legal definition of marriage)
Your legal vows, for which the wording is “I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, [full name], take you, [full name], to be my lawful wedded wife/husband/spouse.” The celebrant may slightly adapt tense or structure, but the meaning must stay the same.
These legal vows are usually followed by your own, personal vows that share promises that truly matter to you as a couple
Even this section can feel warm, natural, and seamless when it’s delivered thoughtfully.
The Ring Exchange
Exchanging rings is optional, but very popular.
Your celebrant will guide you through:
The wording
The order
Any meaning you’d like to attach to the rings
This can be simple and symbolic, or deeply personal.
The Big Moment
Once all the legal requirements are met, your celebrant will formally declare you married - and then comes the kiss, the cheers, and the celebrations.
This is usually followed by signing the marriage register. During this time, I ask the guests to hold tight, and we put on some music that you love, sign the register with your two witnesses and then come back together as a group. I then pronounce you as a married couple, everyone claps, and you (and your wedding party if you have one!) exit down the aisle to some amazing music.
And just like that, you’re officially married 🎊
Some Final Thoughts…
A wedding ceremony doesn’t need to follow a rigid script. It can be modern, relaxed, heartfelt, and entirely personal.
The right celebrant will guide you through the structure while giving you the freedom to shape the ceremony so it feels natural, meaningful, and true to you - not just a formality before the party.
If you’re still early in the planning process, you might also find my guide on finding the right wedding celebrant helpful. It walks you through what to look for, the right questions to ask, and why connection and vibe matter just as much as experience.
If you’re planning a wedding in Tasmania (or beyond!) and would like help creating a ceremony that reflects who you are, I’d love to chat.